After videotaping what seems to be over a hundred toasts I explained to them that there was a common denominator to a bad toast...being too long! This usually begins when one of the bridal party gets up and cracks a joke and the audience responds favorably. This eggs it on and before you know it the person is telling about his or her experiences as a child with the bride or groom. Now the next person feels they have to out-do that or match it, so they do the same...45 minutes later and two bathroom breaks the crowd is talking to each other louder than the toasters. Of course if your DJ is experienced he will gently remind them with a short clip from the Jeopardy theme song or a clock ticking.
I suggest to couples that they give their bridal party a thank you note and include some house rules. Something subtle as "You are not required to give a toast. If you do and you are not comfortable speaking to crowds, just wish us a happy life, thank everyone for coming and then tell all to raise their glasses (signifying that your toast is done)."
The worst, was a bride who went on for 40...yes 40 minutes. All I can say is your toast should not sound as if you are going to die the next day and you are trying to tell everyone, everything you failed to tell them before your demise. Thank both sets of parents, and your new spouse and tell everyone to have a wonderful time. They know you appreciate their participation in your wedding and you will have more than enough time to thank them when you are doing the 'table walk" (as we call it) or when you send them thank-you notes...don't forget the thank you notes!
To close, if your best man and maid of honor do not know what to say...Google it. There are all kinds of toasts you can put together from the internet.
"Here is wishing you the best in your new lives together with many happy hours of watching your wedding video...shall we all raise our glasses?"
